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Before Michigan Legalized Surrogacy, Families Found Ways Around the Ban

Before Michigan Legalized Surrogacy, Families Found Ways Around the Ban

Tammy and Jordan Myers (at left) with their surrogate, Lauren Vermilye, and her husband, Jonathan. Vermilye volunteered to be the Michigan couple鈥檚 surrogate, without compensation, after hearing about Tammy鈥檚 breast cancer. Michigan judges had denied the Myers鈥 prebirth request for parental rights, and the couple had to spend nearly two years legally adopting their biological twins. (The Myers family)

The first time Tammy and Jordan Myers held their twins, the premature babies were so fragile that their tiny faces were mostly covered by oxygen masks and tubing. Their little hands rested gently on Tammy鈥檚 chest as the machines keeping them alive in a neonatal intensive care unit in Grand Rapids, Michigan, beeped and hummed around them.

It was an incredible moment, but also a terrifying one. A court had just denied the Myers鈥 parental rights to the twins, who were born via surrogate using embryos made from Jordan鈥檚 sperm and Tammy鈥檚 eggs. (Tammy鈥檚 eggs had been frozen before she underwent treatment for breast cancer.)

鈥淚n the early hours of their lives, we had no lifesaving medical decision-making power for their care,鈥 Tammy Myers told lawmakers at a Michigan Senate committee hearing in March.

A woman with short brown hair holds a baby on her chest in a hospital bed
Tammy Myers holds her son Eames at a neonatal intensive care unit in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Eames and his twin brother, Ellison, were born prematurely. The Myers then had to spend nearly two years legally adopting their biological twins because, at the time, most types of surrogacy were banned in Michigan. (The Myers family)

Instead, the state鈥檚 surrogacy restrictions required the Myers to legally adopt their biological twins, Eames and Ellison.

鈥淒espite finally being granted legal parenthood of our twins almost two years after they were born, our wounds from this situation remain raw, casting a long shadow over the cherished memories that we missed,鈥 Myers told lawmakers, her voice catching.

Until this spring, Michigan was the only state that had a broad criminal ban on surrogacy. Many families say that ban left them in legal limbo: They were compelled to leave the state to have children; find strangers on Facebook who would carry their child; or, like the Myers, be forced to legally adopt their own biological children.

Gov. Gretchen Whitmer of Michigan signed legislation in April repealing the 1988 criminal ban, legalizing surrogacy contracts and compensated surrogacy after more than three decades. But the legalization is raising fears among conservatives and religious groups, who echo that surrogacy exploits women and makes children 鈥渢he basis of a commercial contract.鈥

As reproductive technology advanced in recent decades, most states passed laws permitting and regulating surrogacy. But Michigan did not, said , a professor at the University of California-Davis School of Law who specializes in family law. Still, those restrictions didn鈥檛 prevent Michiganders from having children via surrogacy.

鈥淐riminal bans, or even civil bans, don鈥檛 end the practice,鈥 Joslin said. 鈥淧eople are still engaged in surrogacy, and it鈥檚 becoming more clear that the effect of a ban is just to leave the parties without any protection. And that includes the person acting as a surrogate.鈥

In 2009, a couple in western Michigan had to of twins after their surrogate decided to . The surrogate claimed that she hadn鈥檛 been aware of an arrest and a mental health issue in the intended mother鈥檚 past. In 2013, a surrogate from Connecticut to give birth, knowing state law would give her parental rights. She and the intended parents had disagreed over whether to terminate the pregnancy following the discovery of .

The Myers family, however, thought they would be able to avoid any protracted legal fights. They had the full support of their surrogate, Lauren Vermilye, a stranger who鈥檇 volunteered to be their surrogate after seeing Tammy鈥檚 posts on Facebook. Yet even with Vermilye and her husband, Jonathan, saying that the twins belonged to the Myers, Michigan judges denied the Myers鈥 request for a prebirth order giving them parental rights.

鈥淎s a devoted family already raising our kind, inclusive and gentle-hearted 8-year-old daughter, Corryn, we were forced to prove our worthiness through invasive psychological testing, home visits, and endless meetings to discuss our parenting plan to prove that we were fit to raise our twins, Eames and Ellison,鈥 Tammy Myers told lawmakers in March.

Opponents of Michigan鈥檚 repeal of its surrogacy ban distinguish altruistic surrogacy 鈥 in which the surrogate mother does not receive any compensation, including for her medical and legal expenses 鈥 from a contract for a child.

Legislators in Michigan鈥檚 House of Representatives passed bills late last year to allow courts to recognize and enforce surrogacy contracts. These bills allowed parents to compensate surrogates, including for medical and legal expenses. But as the legislation moved forward early this year, religious and conservative groups, and some Republican lawmakers, continued voicing their opposition.

Michigan鈥檚 surrogacy laws were not preventing altruistic surrogacy in the state, argued Genevieve Marnon, the legislative director of Right to Life of Michigan, at a state Senate committee hearing in March.

鈥淗owever, current law does require a legal adoption of a child who is born of one woman and then given to another person,鈥 Marnon said. 鈥淭hat practice is child-protective, to prevent the buying and selling of children, and to ensure children are going to a safe home.鈥

Michigan鈥檚 ban on surrogacy is 鈥渋n keeping with much of the rest of the world,鈥 Marnon said in March. Several European countries ban or restrict surrogacy, including Italy, which is on international surrogacy, an arrangement involving a surrogate mother who lives in a different country than the biological parents.

鈥淚ndia, Thailand, and Cambodia had laws similar to those contemplated in these bills, but due to exploitation of their women caused by surrogacy tourism, they changed their laws to stop that,鈥 Marnon told the senators in March.

In January, Pope Francis called for on surrogacy, 鈥渨hich represents a grave violation of the dignity of the woman and the child, based on the exploitation of situations of the mother鈥檚 material needs,鈥 he said.

Rebecca Mastee, a policy advocate with the Michigan Catholic Conference, told lawmakers that while she acknowledged the suffering of people with infertility, surrogacy can exploit women and treat babies like commodities.

鈥淎t the core of such agreements is a contract for a human being,鈥 she said.

鈥淭hat made my blood boil, hearing that,鈥 said Eric Portenga. He and his husband, Kevin O鈥橬eill, had traveled from their home in Ann Arbor to the Capitol in Lansing to attend the hearings in March.

If you鈥檝e been through the surrogacy process 鈥測ou know there鈥檚 no commodification at all,鈥 Portenga said. 鈥淵ou want a family because you have love to give. And you want to build the love that you have, with your family.鈥

When Portenga and O鈥橬eill were trying to become fathers, they reached out to surrogacy agencies in other states but were told the process would cost $200,000. 鈥淲e would have had to have sold the house,鈥 O鈥橬eill said.

Like the Myers, the couple turned to Facebook and social media, 鈥渏ust putting our story out there that we wanted to become dads,鈥 O鈥橬eill said. A friend of a friend, Maureen Farris, reached out to the couple: She鈥檇 been wanting to help a family through surrogacy for years, she said. And Farris lived just a few hours south in Ohio, where surrogacy contracts and compensation are legal.

Farris鈥 contract with Portenga and O鈥橬eill was fairly standard. Both sides had to undergo psychological background checks and have legal representation. The contract also set compensation for Farris, which covered medical and legal fees. The contract stipulated Farris couldn鈥檛 travel to Michigan beyond a certain point in her pregnancy because if she鈥檇 gone into labor and given birth in the state, she would be considered the legal parent of the child.

That contract, Portenga and O鈥橬eill said, gave Farris more protection and agency than she would have had in Michigan at the time. 鈥淭hey鈥檙e carrying a human life inside of them,鈥 O鈥橬eill said of surrogates. 鈥淭hey鈥檙e not able to work. Their bodies will be changed forever. They鈥檙e getting compensated for the amazing gift they鈥檙e giving people.鈥

After the embryo transfer was successful, Portenga and O鈥橬eill learned Farris was pregnant 鈥 with identical triplet girls.

鈥淭hey came out and just unraveled this huge string of ultrasound photographs and, and that鈥檚 when we knew our life had changed,鈥 Portenga said, sitting at home in the family鈥檚 kitchen. The girls were born in Ohio 鈥 where the dads could be legally named their parents 鈥 and then the family of five returned to Michigan.

Today, Sylvie, Parker, and Robin O鈥橬eill are 2 years old, and very busy. Parker is the 鈥渓eader of the pack,鈥 while Robin is the 鈥渂rains of the operation鈥 鈥 she can count to 10 but likes to skip the number five. Sylvie is 鈥渢he most affectionate, the most sensitive, of the three of them,鈥 O鈥橬eill said. 鈥淏ut their bond is so amazing to watch. And we鈥檙e so lucky to be their dads.鈥

This article is from a partnership that includes , , and 麻豆女优 Health News.